A Soft Flutter of Newly Found Wings

In this country of mine, from which I have been absent for 22 years, I was lost..

But I am found in my soul of knowing who I am. I am a peaceful heart, loving being, joyful woman,
one who wishes to help others discover who they are in their own souls of knowing.

They are not a big house, or a job that provides money but not joy; they are not their cars or their children or their children's achievements.

They are a wealth of talent, creativity and blessings that they are no longer aware of.
They must go away and listen to their souls.
Turn off the commands, turn down the expectations, flee from the noise....

towards the silence of nature where their soul will unfurl itself in its long lost element,
where their gifts, creativity and blessings will unwind the tightly woven silk strings of their oppressing cocoon..

in order to fly towards sunlight, freedom and discovery like a butterfly.
They will flit from one beautiful flower to another for the sheer pleasure of the uniqueness of who they are there, at that moment,

until they land confidently on their destined perch, gently settling with a soft flutter of their newly found wings.

Burkas in America

My flight from London arrived yesterday into Washington Dulles Airport at the same time as a flight from Riahd Saudi Arabia. I was at first surprised by, and then curious about the many women in burkas, it is the first time I have seen them in person. As we made our way to the US Citizens line in the immigration area I noticed a family of four. A young father two children around 5 and 6 and an obviously young petite woman covered from head to foot, except her eyes, in black. All the other burkas and their groups were in the non-US citizen lines. So I proceeded to watch the advancement of this family in the immigration process to see if the immigration officer would make her lift the veil in order to compare her face to her passport picture.
What surprise, indignation and anger I felt when HE DID NOT!
What? Was there a James Bond like eye tester machine she looked into to confirm her identity? There wasn't one in my line... How did he know she was who her passport said, or was that photo of a veil and two eyes too?
We as airline passengers are foreced into ridiculous and degrading security measures at every airport world wide because of Islam sponsored terrorism and yet the women are allowed to enter into the US (and this one as a US citizen!) without showing her face because it's against Islam!! What about our security? PLEASE! We need to set rules for ALL based on OUR customs and beliefs and security needs.
I am not saying they should have to remove them during their stay here, (although I'd like a debate on that) but at least to enter the country!
Since I have read the book Infidel by Ayaan Hirsi Ali, I have become much more supportive of our nation putting our foot down, and walking less on eggshells about applying our cultural, constitutional and American values. If anyone doesn't like it, then they are welcome to return to the countries they have immigrated from, if those traditions are so great stay where they are accepted.

Dad's on the Plaza

I was sitting in the central Plaza de la Merced in the heart of historical Malaga around noon yesterday for about 30 minutes , and in that time I watched five different men spending time with their children in the plaza. They ranged from 25 - 30 years old I would guess and the children ranged from a few months in a tummy pack to toddlers of 2 or 3 with tricycles or a ball. They were not toting the kids with them from point A to point B in strollers, rather they were taking them for a morning stroll and playtime in the plaza.
There were no women with kids in the plaza at this time, and only a couple of the fathers (I assume they were the fathers) seemed to be communicating with each other. Mostly they were just letting their child walk and toddle around, or observe the goings on of the plaza from a perch on their daddy's tummy. All seemed quite content to be doing so.
I was surprised, curious and impressed, and convinced that we are on the right path: Children need to be raised by their parents, not in a nursery school, but it doesn't always have to be the mother that stays home to do so, it depends on each couple's abilities, desires and circumstances. Dad's on the plaza enjoying their kids and vice versa is a lovely option.

Returning to the old or fundamental change?

I enjoy spending weekend mornings listening to all the current affairs debate and discussion shows on the international news channels we get: CNN Int’l (a far better cry from the American CNN), BBC Int’l., Al Jazeera, TV5 - France’s English version, Spain’s CNN or 24 hours news station. Subjects range from Int’l. politics, to green initiatives in many cultures, healthcare, education, social justice subjects or the economy. Recently there have been panels made up of financial experts of every kind talking about this “economic crisis”. This morning I listened to another one on BBC Int’l. focusing on whether we’ve hit the bottom and are now coming out of it. Every time I hear these debates it strikes me that there is always a tone of “returning”, “recuperating”, “getting back to stability”, perhaps with a few more regulations, but there is no discussion of a FUNDAMENTAL change in what drives the economy – personal consumption.

The economy has been driven by the developed world’s consumption of disposable goods for decades; it is a policy direction that was voiced after WWll (see the History of Stuff for a quick overview of the policy and system http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gLBE5QAYXp8). But now that so many of us have greatly reduced our consumption – of luxury items, an abundance of trendy fashion, bigger houses, all the furniture and decorative paraphernalia that goes with them, new cars every three years, and a lot of other non-essential “stuff”, do we the consumers really want to go back to the previous levels of consumption, and will we be capable of it, both financially and morally?

I perceive a collective sigh of relief at now having a legitimate reason to slow down the consumption that goes against so many of our grains – against what we learned from and admired in our grandmothers, against the false and short lived joy we got from buying things that we or someone else thought we had to have, against the time we spend shopping – taking it away from friends, family, ourselves or even projects that help others. I think we are ready to move towards other things that fulfill us more and that perhaps we “need” more as well.

By buying less we feel better: we stay within our budget, our environmental footprint is reduced, we have more time with our family and friends, we do things we haven’t had time for, perhaps we take a course and learn new things, all things that fill our soul not our home or closet – that are already overflowing. But this continues to have a negative effect on the employment numbers on a global level, we buy less, there are less revenues, companies cut jobs, those employees consume less so others loose their jobs, now not only in manufacturing and sales outlets, but in the periphery industries like packaging, advertising, graphic design, support services, etc.. It is a downward spiral that hasn’t seen its bottom yet. So now many unemployed have hard time just keeping up with what they really "need".

So in the debates when they talk about consumer trends, the economy, the financial sector, they do so in a mutually exclusive manner from the debates on sustainability, environment, education, healthcare, food supply, water availability, all issues that our global future depends on. Instead they continue to talk about when are we going to be back to where we were, rather than how to we create a new economic order based not on people going back to the consumption model but rather on people going into things that improve so many of the areas that have been ignored or damaged by these decades of consumer based economy.

Maybe this is why Obama is focusing on many of these issues, because the private sector has been too busy with earning, earning, consuming, consuming and not enough on these low profit, non-tangibles that benefit everyone. So now as the government looks to healthcare, the environment and improved education for all levels of the population, you would think a discussion of a FUNDAMENTAL change in what drives the economy would be included on these Int’l. programs and at these big G20 summits, but sadly they are not.

That is the discussion I want to hear, I want to be a part of. How can we all make a living that supports our needs – not our over the top whims – and whose results will help others achieve the same ability, not only in the USA but around the world? How do we go forward economically to a new order that benefits most rather than back to the same old one that only worked for some? When will BBC or CNN or FOX or CNBC have those discussions?

Indulgent Sunday

What a beautiful indulgent Sunday! It is cooler and crisper than it has been in weeks, the oppressive humidity dissipated to who knows where. The light morning lends a sharpness to my recently coiffed impatients and geraniums, the breeze brings wafts of jasmine with it. It is 10oC cooler outside than in, a flip flop over the past few days, and I must be out and enjoy it. How fortunate that I have started a new/old book, Garlic and Sapphires, lent to me this past week by a friend who knows me well.
Recently I have been lent books by friends who have said, ‘I thought you’d enjoy this’ and I realized how well they knew me. Those are the books I have most enjoyed reading this summer. In addition to Sapphires and Garlic by there’s also been Infidel by Ayaan Hirsi Ali, and Water For Elephants by Sara Gruen. All different one from the other, but all stories that have pulled me in and appealed to different facets of who I am. Thank goodness for friends that think of me when they read!
So I made a pot of coffee, grabbed my book, retrieved my glasses and took to my reading lounger on the porch, saying to myself ‘OK Amy, you get an hour, until it gets too hot, and then you must get back to finishing the report on your project they’ll be expecting next week.’ Well, after an hour and the first cup of coffee, I forced myself to break from the adventures of Ruth Reichl, the New York Times restaurant critic who entertains with her beguiling tales of disguises and delectables in the Manhattan restaurant scene. A pang of hunger finally hit me, after no supper last night and all these mouth watering food descriptions. I wondered how it had taken so long, actually. ‘OK Amy,’ I said to myself, ‘make yourself a Sunday breakfast, enjoy the next chapter and a bit more of the breeze as accompaniments and then hit the computer.’
Scrambled eggs, yesterday’s “rustic loaf” toasted with apricot jam, and fruit salad with a splash of amaretto to compliment the odd mix of everything fresh I had on hand: pineapple, peach, melon, apple, pear and grapes off our vine – an odd but refreshing combination, perfect for a peaceful Sunday morning. While finishing the last of the 2nd cup of coffee, I started another chapter.
This woman and her antics, and mostly her beautiful writing, just sucked me in. I didn’t want to put her down. I wanted to be her, to be able to eat 4, 5 or 6 times at the best restaurants not worrying about the cost. I wanted to know food and have the culinary experience and ability to decipher even the most obscure ingredients: squid ink, chocolate in a burgundy sauce, something sweet turning out to be pineapple juice in a Japanese soup. I wanted to be able to disguise myself into someone unrecognizable and then take on a whole new persona to discover parts if me I didn’t even know (or was afraid to know) existed. I haven’t fantasized about being a character in a novel for decades. I am charmed.
Third cup of coffee (only a half – I never have more than two) and I pass the halfway mark of the book. The humidity is still low, the breeze coming around the corner from the patio to my spot on the porch is still fresh and cool, the bees humming in the jasmine are a comforting background noise, so much better than the racket of the lotus’, whose buzzing has been like an non-stop chain saw this past week.
So now I’m on apple juice and sharing my Sunday bliss for a later posting on my blog, and I argue to myself ‘Well Amy, if the report has waited all July to get finished, another Sunday won;t make that much of a difference.’
An evening glass of wine and now I’ve finished the book. What a beautiful indulgent Sunday.

Black or White

I looked at the photos from the Memorial to Michael Jackson held at the Apollo theater in Harlem this week and I couldn't help but observe the 99% black crowd. I found it interesting that they would "worship" a black man who tried to become white. Of course the posters and t-shirts being bought and shown off were images of his Jackson 5 days, Bad and Off the Wall, when he still looked black. I also observed that many who surrounded him, like his doctor and nutritionist, were black. So I ask, if he appealed to his race and supoprted those of his race professionaly, why did he try and look white?

When was the last time you went out to play?

It was hot on Sunday, I spent a good part of the day doing laundry and cleaning the house. So at about 6pm I put on the bikini and dove into the pool without even testing the water.

I proceeded to "play" in the pool like I did as a kid. I am grateful that at my middle age I can still do front and back summersaults in the water, often two in one breath. I can still reach a balance and hold a handstand for more than 10 seconds,

I can still do several backhandsprings (in the water) in a row, getting dizzy and feeling my body weight differently, just like I used to do when I was 12 or 13. (OK so I was a gymnast in my teens) What fun I had playing in the pool! Diving in, swimming lengths in one breath, kicking as hard as I could to make big waves. My 16 year old daughter and her boyfriend could only smile at me in surprised wonder and then take some pictures. I felt myself smiling the whole time too. And what good exercise it was! When was the last time you went out to play?
Last one in is a rotten egg!